


You Still Have My Heart (Even If You Don't Deserve It)

by dragonlands



Series: Please Baby? [2]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bubble Bath, Fluff, Happy Ending, Kissing, M/M, Maybe? At least I tried..., Please Baby?, Romance, Weddings, You Still Have My Heart (Even If You Don't Deserve it)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-12
Updated: 2014-04-12
Packaged: 2018-01-19 02:01:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1451296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dragonlands/pseuds/dragonlands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis is getting married to Eleanor, but at his stag party he meets his ex boyfriend Harry, and things happen. In the morning Harry wakes up with empty bed and a note from Louis. (second part to Does she know you can move it like that?)</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Still Have My Heart (Even If You Don't Deserve It)

**Author's Note:**

> Hiiiiiiii! I'm sorry that this took so long... I could blame schoolwork, but I guess only thing I can blame is my lazyness. But I really hope you'll like this! So if you read this it would mean a lot. The title is from Harry's song I guess? I found it from twitter. The song is not released, so don't try looking for it.
> 
> Oh and I don't own One Direction or anyone mentioned in this blah blah blah...
> 
> Enjoy your reading! xx

Harry woke up feeling sick, and his head pounding. It took him a while to remember what happened last night, but when he did remember, a huge smile spread to his face.

He tried to reach to Louis, who he thought was sleeping on the other side of the bed. He frowned and opened his eyes, when he couldn't find the other boy. There was no Louis.

"What...?" Harry uttered to himself, starting to be afraid that he had only dreamed. "Louis?" he shouted.

No answer.

Neither was there voices of water hitting the floor and Louis singing.

Harry felt like crying.

Then he noticed a note on the bedside table. It was written on Louis' handwriting, with few messes of ink which made it look like it was written in a hurry. He felt relived; maybe Louis had just went to buy them breakfast from downstars and was already on his way back. It had to be that.

Harry picked the note, and started reading.

~~_Dear_ ~~

~~_Hi_~~  
Harry,

_Sorry. I'm sorry if I gave you wrong image of 'us' by what happened last night. I was really drunk and I wish I could make it undone - but I can't. I'm getting married to a girl I love today -_

Harry had to take a break. Louis was getting fucking married! Louis couldn't get married! Louis was his, Harry's, not some ramdom girl's. He realized that he was crying when he saw waterdrops falling onto Louis' letter. He wiped the tears away and went back to reading.

_\- and this was probably the stupidest thing I could've done._

_Her name is Eleanor, but well, I guess her name doesn't matter to you. I just thought you should know._

_So would it be possible that we tried to forget what happened last night? Pretend that nothing happened? Because that's what I'm going to do anyways._

_I hope you woke up before 12, because you don't have to pay anything if you're out from the hotel before that._

_I wish all the best in your life, and hopefully we'll never meet again._

_Louis x_

Now Harry didn't even try to fight against tears. 

_'Hopefully we'll never meet again'._

"WHY?" Harry shouted to the wall, not caring what his room neighbors would think. His sorrow had had started to step aside, replaced with rage towards Louis.

"How could you?" Harry shouted. "For the second time you left me without trying to talk! Are you that afraid of your _love towards me?!_ Well, this time I won't let you run away!"

Someone banging the door interrupted his little outburst.

"Can you shut the fuck up?! I'm totally fed up with listening you moan in the night and now shouting to someone who clearly isn't there!" the man sounded angrily, and Harry felt a bit embarassed so he shut his mouth.

It was 10.48 am according the clock on the nightstand. He still had time before the outcheck.

Harry got up from the bed and started to look for his clothes, before he realized that he was covered in sweat and dry come. He felt discusting so he desided it would be a good idea to take a shower.

After he had showered and put some clothes on, the clock said 11.05. None of rational weddings would start this early, so he still had time.

He opened the phone, and logged on facebook. He had unfriended Louis after Louis had left Holmes Chapel to study in Manchester, and broken up with him, but they still had some shared friends so he could see his profile.

Harry scrolled through Louis' timeline, feeling like twelwe year old stalker all over again.

Finally he found some conversation between Louis and someone called Stan Lucas, and they were talking about the weddings.

To the chrurch where the weddings were held was 20 minutes drive according google maps, so he grabbed his phone, keys and the keycard, and left the hotel.

He had no idea what he was doing, all he knew was that this time he wouldn't let Louis go.

...

Louis wasn't nervous.

His hands weren't trembling nor was he sweating.

No, he felt like he was going to die. He was shaking like willow on a storm and his sweat was more like a waterfall. Or at least he felt like that.

Eleanor was beautiful. She had a little more make up than usually, her skin was glowing, her hair was on an elegant bun with plaits on the sides. And she was smiling almost ear to ear, looking at Louis like he was the new come of Jesus or something.

And all Louis could feel was guilty. Guilty about kissing Harry, and guilty about having sex with him. But even worse than those were, that this was supposed to be his and Eleanor's big day but all he could think of was Harry.

Then Eleanor was talking. She said her wedding vows, looking at Louis so genuenly, and then the priest turned to look at Louis.

"Repeat after me, Louis", he said. "I, Louis William Tomlinson, take you Eleanor Jane Calder, to be my wife. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life."

Louis eyes were scanning along the wedding audience as the priest talked. Suddently he noticed, that the door on the back of the church opened. Some peoples on the last row turned, but most of the guests didn't notice anything.

The priest had stopped talking. Now was Louis' turn.

He absolutely did not feel like the guy from Hot 'n Cold music video.

Was the audience already leaning in?

The boy who had arrived to the church wasn't a guest who showed up disrespectfully late. Neither was he a lost tourist. He was ridiculously tall, and he had ridiculously curly hair. He was Harry.

Of course he was Harry.

Louis tried to remember what he was supposed to say. Right.

Was the priest dancing? Louis checked. Not yet.

"I, Louis William Tomlinson", he started slowly, not able to turn his gaze away from Harry's eyes. Harry stared at him intensively. He could almost see the green of his eyes from the other side of the church.

"Take you Harry -" his eyes opened wide when he realized what he just had said. "Eleanor! I said Eleanor! Eleanor Jane Calder!" 

The audience was silent. The priest was silent. Eleanor was silent. "Eleanor, Eleanor, Eleanor!" he tried again. His eyes had started to feel watery. This couldn't be happening.

"Do you want me to repeat?" the priest asked, looking at Eleanor. Louis nodded.

"Harry?" Eleanor said quietly, ignoring the priest. Louis shook his head, but with every turn of his head it only came more and more clear.

He had never stopped loving Harry.

A single tear escaped his eye.

He ran away.

He just ran away from his own wedding, leaving Eleanor to the aisle.

It was probably the stupidest thing he could've done, but he was Louis Do Before You Think And Regret Later Tomlinson.

Plus, he had already seen this on friends. Ross and Rachel made everything so hard for each other, and he always _screamed_ when they did something stupid or broke up, and he didn't want to make his imaginary viewers scream because of his stupidicy. Not anymore, at least.

But at the end, Ross and Rachel were meant to be, so maybe he and Harry were too. Maybe.

He realized he hadn't stopped running when he felt strong arms grabbing his waist, and holding him in place.

"What are you doing?!" he asked, trying to sound angry but it came out as scared.

"You can't run around like a headless chicken, love. You could get hit by a car, and then I'd have to cry", a deep voice answered. It annoyed Louis how Harry was so calm.

"You ruined my life", Louis said silently, but didn't try to get out of Harry's gasp.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Harry asked, turning Louis to face him. His face was full of emotions; hurt, sadness, joy, love, anger and confuse. "You left me when I thought we were going to live happily ever after."

"You were supposed to be my best friend!" Louis screamed. "But then you kissed me and made me feel things I wasn't supposed to and one thing led to another and friends with benefits turned into boyfriends and then I had to leave you and go to another uni because it was never supposed to be anything and we were never supposed to be anything!"

" _We were never supposed to be anything!?_ What the hell?! Nothing is never supposed to be anything before it is something. And I thought we were something. Something worth fighting for. So tell me, _why are you so scared?_ " 

Harry didn't get mad often, he was usually the calm and nice guy, but when he did, he got really angry. Right now was one of those moments.

"I am not scared!" Louis shouted, sounding defensive.

"Then what prevents you from loving me?" Harry shouted back. There was a tear running down Louis' cheek, and Harry reached to swipe it away. Seeing Louis hurt instantly made him feel bad for shouting at him.

"I love Eleanor", Louis said, sounding off.

"No you don't", Harry answered.

"No I don't", Louis admitted.

"Then answer me."

"What if they don't accept us?"

"Who?"

"Our family. Friends. Everybody." Second tear escaped from the corner of Louis' eye, and Harry felt terrible. He knew this wasn't his fault, it was actually Louis' fault to be exact, but he still felt guilty. If they had talked about this earlier, before Louis went to uni, he wouldn't have to go trough all this.

Harry wrapped his arms around the tiny boy, and pressed him tight agains his chest.

"Of course they will! And if someone dares to such a dick and won't accept us, they're not worth us!" Harry told him. Louis pushed him gently away, wiping off the tears.

"This is embarassing", he said, laughing quietly.

 

"No it's not. This is your wedding, and I came and ruined it, you have all rights to be mad at me and cry."

"Shit! The wedding is still on! I can't cancel it like this! Mum will kill me, she was so exited about this!"

Harry just stroked his back calmingly, and leaned closer untill his lips were so close to Louis' that he could feel the warmth.

"Is this okay love?" he asked, and Louis nodded. He closed the last inch between their lips, closing his eyes.

The kiss was sweet and Louis tasted like vanilla. It was nothing like that drunken, sex-starved kiss from yesterday. No, this kiss was heaven.

Louis's lips were soft but firm, like they knew what they wanted and also knew how to get it. Harry's stomack was full of little cute butterflies, but they were being far too active for his liking.

There was no tongue, just two pairs of lips trying to figure each other out, and it was the most intense thing Harry had ever done. The most intense thing Louis had ever done.

Because the kiss didn't say 'I want you' but 'I love you'.

They finally pulled apart, both feeling tingly all over.

"Just to make sure if you already didn't realize; I love you", Louis whispered, making Harry's heart beat faster than it already had.

"I love you too. Have loved you since I knew what love was, probably. But now we have weddings to cancel."

Louis smiled.

"I can do anything with you on my side. C'mon, let's do this Baby Cakes", he said grabbing Harry's hand and started walking back towatds the church.

...

Things weren't that great at the church. People were standing looking confused. Eleanor was standing on the aisle, and even though she tried to look like she had evrything under control, Louis could clearly see tears on her cheeks.

Louis let go of Harry's hand before anyone could notice. He didn't want to make things worse, not yet.

"Stay here", Louis whispered, and Harry nodded.

When everyone noticed that Louis was back, the audience turned silent, only few under breath said offenses were heard.

"I warned Eleanor about him! But did she listen? No!" "He has probably cheated on her." "What a heartless idiot!" "I always said he looked gay!"

Louis let his nails sink into his palm.

'Don't listen', he kept telling himself. 'My movie. I'm the protagonist. They aren't important for the plot. I will have my happy ending.'

It helped him. He knew he didn't have to impress Eleanor's family. Anymore.

"Mum, dad", he said when they were within earshot. "I'm cancelling the weddings."

"But Louis! Why? We can still get things back in order and continue the weddings", Jay said, with forced-looking smile on her face.

"I don't want to", Louis said quietly.

"But of course you do!" his dad said then. "Why would you be getting married if you didn't want to?"

"Well, that's why I'm not getting married anymore. Not today. Not to Eleanor", Louis answered.

"And what is that supposed to mean?! Do you have someone else?" Jay sounded upset.

"I-", Louis started, when Félicite interrupted him.

"Mum, don't be so harsh for him. Don't you see how torn out he looks?"

'Thank you', Louis mouthed to her. "Please?" he the said to his parents. "I need to talk to El now, can you please tell the guests to leave?"

"Are you serious?" his dad asked. "The amont of time and money we've given to this, all just so you can chicken out in the last minute?"

"Dan, he looks pretty serious. This is not going to break our household anyways. Let him do what he pleases", Jay said.

"Well, I guess we should. But I still think it's pretty late to change mind now."

"Thank you. Thank you. Thank you", Louis said fighting agaist tears. He gave a quik hug for his parents, and then went to the aisle where Eleanor still was.

"Hi", he said quietly. Eleanor directed her eyes to him. They were red from crying.

"What the fuck is this?" she asked, failing to sound angry and only sounding sad.

"Let's go talk to somewhere more private", he said as he led her out of the churh's door, to the opposite side of the church than the one where Harry was still waiting. There was a beautiful garden, and he sat down to a bench under a large oak.

"Who's Harry?" she said after she had sit down too.

"My old friend", he said, and then sighed. "My old boyfriend."

"You never told me you were... into men", she said. She didn't sound disgusted, what was a good thing.

"I never though it was necessary. I'm into women too, bi, maybe, or pansexual. I don't care. Because I'm only into one person now."

A small spark of hope lighed in her eyes, and Louis felt bad for knowing that he'd have to destroy it.

"I met Harry yesterday. On my stag party. And we kinda... I cheated on you. I'm so so sorry", he whispered.

Eleanor stood silent, and Louis thought it'd be better to do it all at once.

"Me and Harry, we have known each other since kindergarten. We were best friends. Really close kind of best friends. Then we kissed on Harry's fifteenth birthday party. We tried to forget that, but it kept happening every time we were drunk, and it became kind of a thing. Friends with benefits. And then we started doing it when we were sober too. And suddently he wanted to be boyfriends. And in some level, we were, but I never fully accepted that term. Because I was scared. Scared about my family being homophobics... even though... I really hope I'm wrong. Because I desided to give Harry another chance. I'm so sorry. So sorry."

He felt terrible. Eleanor had given him four years of her life, she had given him her heart, and now he was there saying that none of that mattered, because he belonged to someone else.

He was waiting for something to happen, scared about what was about to come. Eleanor opened her mouth.

"He was that guy whose picture I found from your phone, wasn't he? That one where you were kissing his cheek and you were smiling", she said slowly. "You told me he was your friend! I told you every fucking guy I was with! And you didn't! I thought relationships were about mutual trust!"

"Again, I'm so sorry." There was nothing else he could say. "My family will pay you everything you spend this wedding."

"I don't want your fucking money! I hate you! I don't wanna see you ever again!"

With that, she just ran away. Louis close his eyes for a minute.

When he had calmed down a bit, he circled the church avoiding frustated guests on there, and when he saw Harry, he wrapped his arms around him from behind.

"Guess who?" he murmured to the younger boy's ear.

"My teacher from the third grade?" Harry guessed giggling.

"Wanker", Louis snorted.

"But I'm your wanker", Harry answered softly.

"Yes you are."

Some woman, Eleanor's cousin probably, gave them dirty glare.

"Babe, my parents can handle things there, so maybe we could leave somewhere else... You know, if you don't wanna stay here and get killed by Eleanor's dad...", Louis said. "We can come back when everything has settled a bit, and then we can tell them about us." He offered Harry a small smile, which he returned.

"Well, what are you suggesting then?" Harry asked, lifting his eyebrows.

"We could book a hotel... Things were pretty rushed last night. We could re-do them with a bit slower pace if you know what I mean..."

"Mmm, sounds good to me."

...

They ended up taking Harry's car, and driving back to the hotel they had spent their last night. In the hotel Harry prepared them a hot bubble bath.

Louis was laying between Harry's legs, and he felt like everything was great. Birds were chirping very beautifully. Whole bathroom smelt like apples. His stomach was full. Harry's pretty dick was pressing against his back.

"Louis?" Harry breathed.

"Yes Sweetums?"

"I love you."

Louis turned his head so he could see Harry's face. He smiled, placing kiss to the tip of his nose.

"I love you too", he replied, before he pressed his lips against Harry's lips.

He would never let Harry go again.

**Author's Note:**

> So what did you think? Comment, kudos, all that shit please? Yeah and my native language still isn't English but Finnish so please if you find any mistakes, comment about them. Aaaand I'm still in the need of beta so if you're interested please contact me (though twitter if possible)! I'm working on a big chaptered thing atm, but I'm not sure if it will be good. If it is, I will put it here. Okay that's all ily stay fab! xx
> 
> Twitter: @thrustlarry


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